Thursday, May 1, 2008

Decisions and Confusion

This is me taking a very deep breath....
I am a little overwhelmed with decision making right now. I seem to have some big issues with change, always thinking negatively. And in the whole scheme of things, this should not really be a big deal. I have been at my job for only a year and a half, but in that company that is a lifetime. Huge staff overturn in that place. Mostly because, as I have explained before, we are "graded" based on our per person sales and only make bonus on product(lotion) sales. But if you grade is low, you don't see the decent bonuses. And they are VERY strict. I understand they are a big company with lots of very young girls working there, but they make no exceptions for emergencies. For instance, if I am 1 min. late because there was an accident blocking the road or even if I get into an accident, I would lose a dollar an hour for every hour worked that week plus lose much of my product bonus. If you drive to Allendale for a meeting and are a minute late, they lock you out and you lose your entire bonus check for the month the $1 and hour for the week and you can not be on the schedule until the next meeting a month later. They will not accept any excuse. Last year when my Grandma died, I lost all kinds of $ just so I could attend her funeral. I even had to stay at work once I found out she had passed. Now this is the only time I ever lost any $$ mostly because I have just plain old been too scared to miss work and I usually show up 20 mins. early for meetings! So this is really just the tip of the iceberg with this place but it gives ya an idea why I am unhappy. What I love about it is the people that come in, and the fact that I get the hours I want because my sales are good. But if they drop, I'll be in big trouble. Another bad thing w/MSC is that they do not have a "the customer is always right" attitude. That is very hard for me. I will usually go to great lengths to make something right with people when I am working customer service. Needless to say, every day is a bit of a challenge for me there...did I mention that the 21 year old manager of the salon actually lives next door(attached)? Yeah, she's on a bit of a power trip....we cannot have any outside reading materials or cell phones.This is a pretty slow tanning salon. Lots of down time. She had our refrigerator removed and also just took out a couch because we might sit on it....we are not allowed to sit. ever.
So another opportunity has presented itself. Its about the same $$ (per hour)but less hours. VERY much less stress. But the income will be lower, and right now Jason and I are trying to get some "stuff" taken care of. So I am just so torn. And to top it off, I am going back to school. I need to talk to a councilor asap. I really want to get into the public schools, just not as a teacher. A friend told me you can do a lot with a child development associates degree, and that seems about right to me. A lot of positions would allow my kids to be with me(or at least free daycare). So I am very serious about getting into that. I try to keep in mind that if I don't like it, I can go back to school again and try something else! It's OK. I am not trapped unless I just sit here. But I've been idle for too long. It just that fear of change, or really, a fear of making the wrong decision and regretting it.
I wish someone would just TELL me what to do!

The picture has nothing to do with the post, its just there to keep me grounded and remind me what it's REALLY all about:)

3 comments:

Kristin said...

You have got a great head on your shoulders! I know it is hard to make decisions, heaven knows, I can't do it to save my life, but when push comes to shove, I know you will do what is right for you and your family. Sometimes less stress is WORTH way more than the $$!!! I think you should just bite the bullet and quit, get the new job, go to school and be the best Jennie (wife, mom) you can be!!!
My advice, make your decision and stick with it. Don't go back and forth second guessing yourself. It will just make you sick. You know what is best for you! Trust yourself...if you can't who can:)?

Life in the Fast Lane said...

I can't believe that a company can get away with treating it's employee's so poorly. I seriosly have never heard of anything like that. I will never step foot in that place knowing how it treats the people that work for them!! I know your work ethic and you do not deserve to be treated like you described!! Now as far as my opinion I would definetly step back and look at the long term, and what would help you get to where you want to be. It sounds like in the long run your current employer has nothing to offer you and given that they don't have a good track record for keeping people around for long at all you would probably benfit from cutting you loses now instead of later? Good luck with your dicision, I know how hard it can be, I am going through some similar things right now also (as I'm sure you have heard)
~L

Shelly said...

I also do not like change as my husband loves to remind me, it scares the heck out of me, I'm finding out because of always being to afraid I am missing out on a lot of good things. Sometimes in life we must take chances and it is okay if we are sometimes wrong in our decisions. When one door closes another door opens. I know it's hard because this decision doesn't just affect you it affects your family as well. Just don't settle Jen, thats not you. Good Luck and I will be praying for you to find peace with your decision...